My Gay Toronto - Bellini's 8 1/2

Your mother can read this

by Paul Bellini

Greg Scarnici is a native New Yorker, an associate producer at Saturday Night Live, and the type of gay guy who embraces every challenge. In the course of his career, he has written and performed a multi-character one-man show called Man-A-Thon, written and directed an indie feature called Glam-Trash, released a parody of Madonna’s Sex book, and once got his dick caught in a zipper. Now, he has written an autobiography of sorts, called I Hope My Mother Doesn’t Read This (2015, from Thought Catalogue publishers).

The book is filled with hilarious anecdotes, told in Greg’s lively tone of voice. Like how his female friends used him for blowjob practice, or how he came out at The Limelight, or how he would peruse an International Male catalogue for inspiration. His celebrity encounters are funny too, like quoting Gina Gershon a line from Showgirls, or getting wasted with the little guy from Twin Peaks. And there are lots of harrowing drug use stories as well.

Greg is philosophical about it all. Even though the one-man show and the feature both went nowhere, he is proud he did them. “I had the balls to go through with these things,” he tells me via phone. “But doing everything on my own was not the right circumstance.” Greg is in full control of his biography, however. He started writing it as an exercise, and couldn’t stop. I’ll be honest, I was hoping it would be a little more dishy when it came to SNL, but Greg still works there. He does tell one funny story, about how he, a practical joker, changed the opening sketch cue card to “Live from New York, work this pussy!” but then changed it back at the last minute.

Aside from his job, Greg is also a DJ who works all summer on Fire Island and has just released a disc of house music. He has also been in a relationship for over 20 years with a man named Paul, a lawyer who loves to cook and fix things. But most of all, he loves New York. “I could never leave this city,” he told me. Who can blame him?

Find more of Greg at