Quiet Please! There's a Lady on Stage: David Ramsden's classy classic returns
4 Oct 2019

by Drew Rowsome -

Every so often, social media offers up a feel good story, and a worthy artist gets some of the recognition they deserve. A series of posts by the inimitable David Ramsden tell the story of the exciting return of Quiet Please! There's a Lady on Stage. Ramsden has performed far too infrequently lately and this is an opportunity to enjoy his talents, and those of his "ladies," in a deservedly opulent venue. Best to ley Ramsden tell the saga in his own voice, quoted from Facebook, as unique and delicious as his singing voice.

January 13

This could be a long read. I got well known in the late '80s and '90s as a musician, an actor, a writer and a performer, and of course a bon vivant! In particular I became known as the creator and host of Quiet Please! There's A Lady On Stage. It ran for three years at the Cameron House, served as the basis for the Jeremy Podeswa film Standards which aired on CBC television, ran for two sold out concerts at the lovely Winter Garden Theatre, then a popular live series at the Glenn Gould Theatre produced by Kevin Oleary that aired nationally on CBC radio in 1994, and then some appearances with Rebecca Jenkins and Molly Johnson. In other words, it had a life. A  rather long life that lasted ten years. The reason that I stopped doing it was that I wanted to focus on doing a CD of my original stuff. People still suggest that I revive it and sometimes I think of it.

I've always loved old songs and ballads and seeing Molly Johnson do "Blue Mondays" in the '80s made me start thinking that it was something I'd like to do. Her audience was rapt, quiet and respectful, and her repertoire and performance was impeccable. I'd always struggled, especially as a solo artist, with people talking in bars and talking over musicians and singers. Let's just say, it annoyed the fucking hell out of me. I started thinking of doing a series of shows featuring female artists I'd worked with and loved singing with. I wanted us to explore classics and balladry and lyrics you could not only hear but sink into. I knew I wanted to do it at the Cameron House as they had been so welcoming to me and I felt that I wanted to do it almost as a theatrical presentation with sets and everything.

I wanted to give it a name and an identity, and I thought about it for a long time. Then I thought of a song by Peter Allen that he had written for and about Judy Garland after her death. I'd always loved Peter Allen, when I lived in LA briefly in 1980 I'd gone to see him live in concert and he absolutely floored me. He was so talented and so in love with his own campiness and flamboyance. And so out! The song he had written was "Quiet Please! There's A Lady On Stage." How much more perfect could that be? Written by a gay man for his mother-in-law, who just happened to be Judy Fucking Garland. Me, a gay man accompanying a stellar roster of female artists, who wanted them to be heard and listened to and create a romantic and smoky version of the past, well it practically tells you to shut the fuck up in the title of the series and that's how I chose it. That series was good to me. It was like going to school with the best set of teachers you could imagine, because every one of them brought different skill sets and lessons for me to learn. The list seems endless - Rebecca Jenkins, Tamara Silvera, Gina E Stepaniuk, Maggie Moore, Theresa Tova, Laura Hubert, Lori Yates, Carole Pope, Jenny Dean, Cherie Camp, Jane Siberry, Jane Ford, Molly Johnson, Holly Cole, Sarah McLachlan, Lee Whalen, Rita Chiarelli, Joanne Mackell, Cynthia Dale, Pamela Hughes, Lee Shropshire, Barb Mcilquham, Shirley Eikhard, Amanda Marshall, Cindy Matthews, Tabby Johnson, Lorraine Segato, Meryn Cadell, Gabrielle Roddy, Trudy Artman, Michelle McAdorey . . . Like I said it's a long list that goes on and on and eventually became a series of male singers called "Shut Up and Let The Poor Guy Sing!" featuring John Alcorn, Kurt Swinghammer, Willie P. Bennet and so many more. So there's history. A well documented history.

In 2015, I noticed that that Koerner Hall here in Toronto had been holding a concert series of female artists called Quiet Please! There's A Lady On Stage, and I thought: that's odd. And I was slightly perturbed. This will be the fifth year that they are using that title. And every year without fail, I receive messages from people asking if I'm involved in it or drawing my attention to it. And for some reason, maybe cause it's five years in and it finally sunk in, or maybe who the fuck knows, but this year it actually began to bother me. Then I feel weird about being annoyed, but then I'm annoyed again. You can't copyright titles, that's why after Jane Siberry's beautiful song "Calling All Angels," we had to suffer through the travesty that is Train, really just one of the most vile bands ever, and their nauseating song "Calling All Angels." Nothing to do with the original but you can't tell me that they came up with that phrase miraculously on their own. Can't prove it, but I know they heard Jane's song and just took the title and wrote their own. To our misfortune.

In my mind, someone at Koerner Hall didn't just come up with the phrase "Quiet, Please ... " on their own either. There was a precedent and I believe someone there had heard of the Quiet Please title and legacy and just thought, oh what the fuck, we haven't heard from that guy in a while, let's just use the title, it's a great name for a series. I can't be told that there was someone else sitting around who just happened to be a Peter Allen fan (who by the way died sadly way too young in 1992) and remembered that song and thought to themselves, let's name a series after it. Really?

Will I ever do a series of Quiet Please shows again? People have suggested it as recently as two months ago. Who knows? You never know. But if I ever do decide to do it, would I then have to write these people and ask for permission? Or do I just cut to the chase and write them and point out to them that there already exists a series by that name with a real legacy that includes film, television, radio and recording documentation that happened right here in this very same city not so fucking long ago? These are the things that I am pondering.

January 15

So an update from my post two nights ago about Quiet Please! There's A Lady on Stage. A friend of mine forwarded my post to the executive director of Koerner Hall, Mervon Mehta. He wrote me a lovely and very kind letter explaining how he had come up with the name for his series himself, and was totally unaware of my series by the same name. In the five years that it's been running at Koerner Hall, no one had ever mentioned to him that there was already a series by that name. He wasn't even around Toronto when my series ran. He asked if we could meet for lunch next week and we're planning that. Honestly, I was home sick from work the night I wrote the previous post, maybe feeling a bit of my own mortality as I approach the age of 64, maybe sensing how quickly time flies by in this life, and in a fit of pique (which is one of my favourite expressions in the world) I wrote about something that had been bothering me. I could erase my previous post, but what would that do? I don't believe in just erasing my mistakes from this life, and it was another valuable lesson for me on the cost of making assumptions about something you know nothing about, instead of just addressing it directly. So thank you for all your comments. I consider the issue over and I hold nothing against Koerner Hall or Mr. Mehta and am looking forward to our lunch. A true gentleman, or, as my friend described him: a real mensch. Thank you though for all the supportive comments that you left after the initial post.

June 17

Some months ago I posted about Koerner Hall and Quiet Please There's a Lady On Stage. Very kindly the head of Koerner Hall, Mervon Mehta, invited me on a tour of Koerner after becoming aware of my post. I went and met with him and he showed me the beautiful beautiful spaces available to play there. He then asked me if I would be interested in doing a show at Koerner. I was stunned. We talked about various people I might ask to be part of it and when we parted, I said I would get back to him. And then I never did. I've done shit like this before.

Years ago when the Winter Garden contacted me, I didn't respond for almost two weeks. All I could think was that there must be some kind of mistake, it's a little bar show, they can't have seen it. As it turned out, the head of programming, Wende Cartwright, had seen many of those shows which is why she asked me to move it to the Winter Garden. Which led to the two sold out shows there.

There weren't a lot of dates left for the 2019-2020 season at Koerner Hall so I just let it slide. However - Mr. Mehta re-contacted me and asked if I would be more comfortable starting with the smaller space, Mazzoleni Hall, and maybe plan on Koerner Hall itself for the 20-21 season. I had to say yes. So I'm headlining a show there on Sunday, October 6 at 1pm with my special guests Tabby Johnson, Theresa Tova and Lori Yates. The concert is free as these Sunday shows are sponsored by a patron of the Royal Conservatory and tickets are released at their box office a week before the show.

And here's how Mervon Mehta came up with the name for his series. He, like myself, was a huge Peter Allen fan and when Mr Mehta was a singing waiter in NYC in the '80s, he used to cover the song. He wasn't even living in Toronto when my series was taking place, which is why he was unaware of it. So when he took over Koerner Hall, he wanted to have a series of concerts by female artists and thought that song would make a perfect title. In other words, we both had the same idea, just years apart. After we picked a date, I told him I would be happy not to resurrect the series under the same name, however he told me he wanted me to use it and to pay homage to both my old series and the Cameron House. So in the program it says David Ramsden, pianist, vocalist and presenter of the original Quiet Please There's A Lady On Stage concerts at the Cameron House in the 1980s, accompanies a starry line up of Lori Yates, Tabby Johnson and Theresa Tova.

How crazy is that?

I had no intention of reviving that series again, yet it all seems to have come full circle. Also, Mr Mervon Mehta is a true gentleman. I feel that not many people would have made the same gracious offer. I would love it if any of you feel like coming.

Also part of my joke is that I'm the lady on stage - which I'm not sure if people get or not - well my friends do lol

The tickets are free and will be released at the box office at 10am on Monday, September 30. There are a limited number of seats (well, 240 but who's counting?). If you want tickets, the people at Koerner suggested calling right when the box office opens or showing up there that day as the tickets for these Sunday concerts apparently get snapped up rather quickly. It would be nice to see any of you there if you feel like coming!